| Friday, August 25, 2006


argh.
this time, its not my nonsense.

THIS POST CONTAINS LOTS OF MOOD-DESTROYING ELEMENTS.
read if u wanna destroy ure mood.

they dun even appreciate things that i do for them.
things like sleeping on the floor-confined-coffin-sized area just between the wall and bed. amazingly it fits me just nice with my 2 arms by the side tats all. its no-air-con zone as well. warm air reaches me
so they can have more space on bed. and they can stretch their long legs and curl in bed till "early morning" and still tell me night will be lotsa things to do when it was only the 1st night and i and eileen are the only ones talking in the small room of prox 10 ppl.
the way i was sleeping before i had to dig into the dark confined area, though i wouldnt like to say it.. i had to face the wall if not i will be smelling at least 5 ppl's feet while stacking my leg on 3 of them if i wanna sleep with legs straight.

weichai left halfway to toilet, so they all took the chance to spread out with eileen telling me to take over his place.. but i noe him too well. he will pounce. and i didnt wan to squeeze in with so many ppl on the bed so i remained on the feet part.
then sok said she couldnt stretch her legs while i was sleeping there.
so NICELY i went down to the floor at the confined wall-to-bed area.

and while all those on bed had nice time sleeping, i was half DeaD there.oh well, manage to sleep for 30minutes i suppose with ppl coming in and out then disrupting me. with the warm air from the Aircon i ever experience besides my spoilt one.

if its gonna be another bout of me and eileen talk and everyone sleep again, hell NO i will stay. i did not opt to go home for maple my dear. im not that PATHETIC!
to me im thoroughly disappointed. really seriously bad.
if everyone comes together to sleep on tight room and not talk or chat or spend some time together, but rather to regen their energy, i rather force myself to go home and leave them with more space and me with bed.
baofeng also was disappointed. he wanted to go night fishing as well, but seeing all the dead ppl there, who will even wan to suggest when even momo tried to make himself a clown to entertain ppl who are sleeping, so that the chalet can last thru the night!?

if me or nor is that pathetic about maple which everyone claims like mad. lisong, sokpeng, mingen, benedict, will we even come to stay for the 1st night? nor even had eye infection and still came. i had exp x2 but still came. im willing to forfeit my 2nd night if the night is really "happening" instead of the disappointment me and eileen received in the 1st night.
extremely disappointed when even u also said the same as them.
pointing either me or nor.

even morning came also same. eileen already bathed at 7 and is waiting everyone.
i just dunnoe..
i asked rog whether wans to go swimming pool public washroom to bath. so i asked nor too. so that sokpeng can have her own nice time to bath. and shortened queue
end up rog wans to bath in the chalet, so i had no choice but to bath as well.
much to my disappointment again, everyone is awake except sok..

even after breakfast came back to rest from macD, the same happen.. and i dunnoe why everyone start doing their own things and all. mahjong and stuff. when we are suppose to change pants to go cycling or swimming. so had to play a game of cards with the leftover waiting ppl.

and even after cycling, i doubt i can even stay thru out the whole night.. im spent as i noe im fat and all. lousy and all. ugly and all. slow and all. irritating and all. yes had to go home and all.
wah then just shoot at us like that..

dunnoe its wat CRAP but im absolutely sure im feeling more disappointed and rotten now than even any PMS on the world!

and to add on to it, my dearest mum even cooked dinner for me cos her incapable son told her will be staying 1 night and coming home on the next morning. end up i came home after dinner with frens..
i noe she had work at 2+ pm so she must have woke up early to go market to get ingredients to cook soup for us. yet i had let her down. by not eating finish it though i really had to stuff some soup in..
ok.. she came back at twelve and before i was knowing it, she was washing the dishes. so i can sense her disappointment even though i asked her is she angry?

she just said,"why angry..? i noe u all cant finish de.."
im just so down with tat..
and wats even sad is, she called me at 5+ during her work just to let me noe there is rice already cooked. and i told her i will be eating out cos promised with frens..
rmbering it, i also promised her i will finish it. but yet.. i didnt.
when she called, she didnt even told me to eat but just asked am i coming home from chalet? which shows she is putting my chalet piriority over her food.. which makes me feel horribly miserable.

horribly
horribly
miserable.


but.. i think i should do something as an apology to my dearest and prettiest mother tml morning.
as for chalet, i think its just best i let it rest.
this post isnt aimed at anyone. and i wouldnt wan to rmb it either.
i just felt dumb again. its another case of bashing my head on the wall.. and its serious this time.

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Created at 2:20 AM
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